To apply the lessons of attraction in close friendships, requires making a point of practicing the five relational maintenance behaviors—positivity, openness, assurances, social networks, and sharing tasks. To learn these lessons requires according to Floyd (2011) noting the difference between physical, social, and task attraction. Close friendships always include one or more forms of interpersonal attraction. We might be attracted to someone's personality. We might find the person physically attractive. We might also be drawn to someone as a work partner. Close friends are those few people we share close, caring and trusting relationships characterized by a high degree of commitment, trust, interdependence, disclosure and enjoyment. With close friends, we show commitment by pledging ourselves and our time to each other. We show trust by having positive expectations of the other person and believing that he or she will behave fairly and honestly.
Social Attraction ___ I find this person easy to be around. ___ I really enjoy his or her personality. ___ We get along really well with each other. ___ He or she is the kind of person I like to spend time with.
Physical Attraction ___ I think this person is good looking. ___ He or she has a nice appearance. ___ Most people would find this person physically attractive. ___ This person has a nice look.
Task Attraction ___ This person would be fun to work with. _-_ I can always count on this person. ___ I would enjoy studying with this person. ___ This person is very dependable.
Friends provide a lot more than just a sense of belonging and reliable alliance. They also provide necessary anchor points for opinions, beliefs and emotional responses. Another additional function healthy freindship provide is a place for communication to occur; communication about anything, not just important events but also trivial stuff as well as personal intimate details about oneself. Friends increase our self esteem by attending to what we do, listening, asking our advice, and generally acting in ways that indicate the value they place on our opinions.
Appropriate communication and behavior within friendships includes; showing support, seeking support, respecting privacy, keeping confidences, defending friends, avoiding public criticism, making friends happy, managing jealousy, sharing humor and maintaining equity. Friends also conscientiously repay debts, return favors, and keep the exchange of gifts and compliments balanced. For friendships to develop and continue, some key behaviors are initiation, responsiveness, self disclosure and emotional support. We need friends to keep us healthy both physically and mentally.